James William Draper

Little James... He loves his fingers

Before James

The Boys meet for the 1st time

Mom & James snuggling

Dad & James Hanging Out watching Bond, James Bond

He is finally here! James William was born Nov 4, 2010. He was 8lbs 9oz & 20in long. It was a little scary for me since he was breech & they decided it was in the best interest of everyone to do a C-section at my Wednesday appointment. So then we set up a C-section for the next day. Good bye chipotle burritos, A1, sauce & fondue cravings. Hello he is finally going to be here. It happened all so quickly. I'm still not sure what to think of it all & I'm still recovering. I think the worst part of the whole C-section thing is not being able to function for so long because you are recovering from surgery. Holding your baby is even hard sometimes.

My thoughts on my C-section... I really loved the anesthesiologist. He had a nice soothing voice (reminded me of a loving bishop voice) He helped calm me down and talk me through everything. There was also a nurse in training there. she was cool. When they were giving me my epidural, I was leaning into the nurse so they could poke me. I was so nervous on verge of tears and she took my hand. At first I thought it was Jason until I realized it was the nurse in training (they let Jason in after the epidural). That was really nice of her & I really needed it. Poor girl though, she had to leave because she was getting nausua during the procedure. So overall the C-section was ok. It was great to see & hear my baby cry, but I really couldn't hold him for awhile. When we got back to the room, my spinal had worn off & they didn't have my pain killers to run through the epidural line yet. I was in pain so until that died down, I really didn't have a desire to hold him.

Recovery - The worst part was the day after the c-section (Jason went home to sleep & be with Josh), I had a totally sucky nurse and guess what I got her again the next day. She just wasn't very punctual ...15-30 min after I push the freaking button. I was in tears. Good thing I wasn't dying, but she was starving my baby since I couldn't get up to feed him...don't get me started on her. She tried making it up the next day. Still her bedside manner sucked. So after being all emotionally ticked about being neglected then we go through a roller coaster about our son's kidney's heart & at one point his liver & all of this after a sono was done & after my doctor said everything was fine. I guess the doctor on call from my pediatrian's office didn't know there was a sono of Jamse & only saw the sono of him when he was inside of me which showed water around his kidneys. She ordered x-ray and thought the heart looked big and so did the liver so they took another one and had a specialist come in. The specialist seemed very competent that everything was ok & now I know which pediatrician in the practice I will never go to. I don't tell it very well, but it was almost like this pediatrician was on a witch hunt to find something wrong.

On the flip side. I loved my night shift nurses. They are the best. I had one 2 nights in a row. That was cool. She took really cute picture of James. So far, it has been super nice to have my mom, sister in law, & mother in law close by. They have been a big help with Josh & help around my house as I recover. I'm also greatful for all the meals church friends brought by. Recovery after a c-section is a lot harder because you can't funtion like normal...you can't walk very well, lift anything, or drive. You hurt & you are tired all the time on top of it all. Next time I hear someone is having a C-section, I'm going to help them out as much as possible. Especially if they don't have family near by.

I Wasn't Going To Be That Mom

I was so excited for Josh to start school today. We packed his backpack last night, we got up early this morning, and we were ready to go. You would think it was my first day of school I was so excited. So after we got there, we walked to his new classroom with his teacher and hung up his bag and picked out a toy. I told him goodbye and he said bye bye and was going to leave with me so of course there was that "separation upset." No big deal right...he does it a Jazzercise and church nursery and he is fine in less then 2 minutes, but then it hit me he is going to school and getting so big. Yes I got a little teary eyed. This is the first time I'm leaving him with someone unrelated to him where I won't be in the same building. Big steps for mom. I didn't think I was "that type of mom" that gets all emotional about things like this. Maybe I will blame it on hormones. Anyway I'm fine now. After dropping him off, I went to babysit Jazzercise today and it really felt like I forgot him at home... Although today was definitely the day where, he was better off at school than in that Jazzercise room. There was a newer kid/baby that cried half the time. After Jazzercise babysitting, I came home to a nice message from Josh's teacher, that he was doing great and he was fine a few minutes after I left. Well I better go get something done before it is time to pick him up.

Stuck in the Daily Poo

WARNING: lots of complaining ahead.....I feel sluggish and tired and stuck in the daily rut. I don't know what it is or how to get out of it. Yesterday was a full day of work & Josh. Most of work I got done the night before, but there was an extra thing they asked me to do...I did...then they didn't want it done...already submitted to the bank...it's kind of hard to undo after that even though I tried. I feel bad, although I shouldn't...they really should make up their minds...anyway that was hard to balance because it was after nap time...thank you Wall-E(Josh really liked the 1st 40 min of that show) and Ginger for help. Now lets talk about before nap time...for the past couple of days Josh will only drink milk & eat fruit = yucky slimey poo = messy all over pants...I ended up changing him in the bath tub after trying to take off his pants & getting it all over his legs & feet. After a good rinse under the facet, I scrubbed him down well. Now lets warp to later...Jason is home...dinner time. Josh will not taste anything. He needs to eat something. I don't want to go through another poo mess. We end up force feeding him some mashed potatoes. I just wanted him to taste some. He could reject later after he tried it. Well he showed us. He wouldn't swallow & then he started gagging on it until he vomited the contents of his stomach all over himself. Wonderful day. So here I am...work at the moment is not fulfilling/fun...not to mention I starting to worry about W2/end of the year returns that I have to do. I'm such a worry wart. At home Josh likes to see how far he can go with my patients. Plus the doctor has me half way worried that he is not talking yet...Although I'm not so sure I like my new doctor. And finally Jason is never home...work, thesis, gym, & seminary seems to be his life at the moment. So the next question how do I get out of this rut...Christmas music, a good house cleaning, or a day off...I don't know maybe I will try all 3.

Stair Stepping toward the IPhone

So yes Jason is finally going to get the IPhone. He was going to get it today but they ran out by the time he got to the front of the line. He called me to tell me that he is now on a waiting list. I was sad for him because he was soooo excited last night. During this 3 minutes conversation on the phone that we had, Josh was crawling around downstairs (I was in the living room). After hanging up, I called his name. He was being too quiet. I come to find him upstairs in his bathroom. So he managed to crawl all the way up by himself and not fall. I was a little freaked out and excited for him at the same time. I guess I need to start putting the gate at the bottom of the stairs now. We had been working on stairs, but after 3 he gives up and slides back down. I guess he just climbed over that obsticle and now he is a mountain climber. Josh is fast & Mom's learning curve is a little slow

Sleeping Beauty, The Mom behind the Baby & Tale of the Bloody Thumb

I have 3 stories to Tell: ....

• SLEEPING BEAUTY: Yea. Finally Heather is home for the summer. It is so exciting to see her again. Just to sit around and have sister talk is so much fun. I'm jealous of Jessica because she gets to see her all the time. So she spent the night at my place on Sunday and boy she likes to sleep in. I got her up at 11. Sure she is one hour behind but she slept through.....Josh, me doing laundry, vacuuming, the garbage truck, the roofer on the roof fixing it, and the builders next door. I'm amazed that she slept through all of it. It also made me feel really productive that I got a bunch done while she was sleeping.

• THE MOM BEHIND THE BABY: I'm having identity issues...kind of. So yesterday Brandon got home. It just annoys me to death how Jason's parents act around Josh. I'm grateful and happy that they love Josh sooo much but they almost express it in ways that make me feel like I don't matter. For instants Brandon gets home. I made it a point that I wanted to be the one holding Josh when Brandon steps off the plane I had to keep telling Jason's dad that I would hold him. They just expect that if they are in the room with Josh that they automatically get to hold him. So Brandon is here. Everyone is saying hi. It's my turn I'm about to say hi/give hugs and Jason's dad cuts me off and says this is Josh...my line after I say my hellos. I know I'm probably just PMSing, but this is just one instants and it's just starting to annoy me. Every time we see them, they don't say hi Jen how are you doing. It is hi Josh as they disappear with my baby. Sometimes if they come over to my house. I just feel awkward as the play with Josh. It's almost like I'm not even there. I think should I go work on something or continue my show I was watching, but then I think that would be rude. I'm glad they love him so much, but I wish they would do it in a way that doesn't make me feel bad/invisible or pounce on my motherhood privileges such as introducing my son.

• TALE OF THE BLOODY THUMB: I had my first child & blood experience today. I don't do well with blood. I was in the scrapbooking room doing a little scrapbooking. Josh was on the floor playing. He started playing with the air intake thing by the door. I kept looking up to make sure he doesn't venture out in the hall and head for the stairs. We were both having fun until the next time I look up and there is blood all over the door. It was like a horror film. I guess he had cut his thumb on one of the tops of the screws or on the vent somehow (I'm still not quite sure how he did it I could not find anything sharp) and then was finger painting with his blood. It was really hard dealing with it because it was a gusher and he would not sit still. I don't think he was bothered by it in the least bit though. After putting a band aid on one thumb. He started putting it in his mouth so I put a band aid on the other so he would have 2 to play with. Hopefully it will stay on. He's sleeping now and I just finished cleaning the blood off my carpet & walls.

Ker Splat or Should I Say Plop or Thud

I am not a nice person in the morning. I'm tired, not coherent, and I try to sleep through any disturbances. Jason usually has to nudge me to go get Josh if he is crying in the middle of the night so this is written through the details I got from Jason....The story begins somewhere between 6:30-7:00 am, somewhere in between the snoozes of Jason's alarm. Jason thought he heard a thud. He shrugged it off. Did he really hear it? It may have been the builders if they got to the neighborhood early. So Jason decides to get up and start getting ready for the day. Then he hears the distinct boinking noise that the door stoppers make when "someone" plays with them. Perplexed and confused he walks over to Josh's room and discovers Josh happily playing on the floor with the door stopper. So congratulations to Josh he now will pull up on things on his own! Shame on Mom & Dad for not making sure his crib mattress was low enough. The last question/thought that lingers in my mind is what happened to the tears. He rolled off our bed once and he cried about it. The drop from his crib would have been higher. It kind of scares me that he didn't cry. Maybe it was his new found freedom that overshot any pain. Motherhood...You can only be so active in your child's life. Teaching him, protecting him, loving him and caring for his needs-the Mother part. The Hood is for all those times you don't have control. You put the hood over your eyes and pray as the child learns on their own and pray that God is watching and that they will be alright.

One Month and Counting

I did it. With mixed emotions, the clock is now ticking down to full time mommyhood...May 15th. Here I come Josh. You will have my full attention.

ROCK CHALK JAYHAWKS!!!! What a nail biter on Monday night, but we made it through and we are the champions!!!!

Motherhood

So when do you magically become a an expert on motherhood? I can now see the first baby is a trial run. After 9 months I have worried about things that don't need to be worried about, I have not worried about things I should be worried about, I have bought things I don't really need, and I have had stupid mom moments that I vowed that I would never do yet it happened and it scared me to pieces. At the end of the day I'm tired and exhausted and don't want to take care of him anymore and I would like some grown up talk so I gratefully hand him over to dad where then he starts laughing and smiling and instinctly I want him back again so weird. On a another note on motherhood this age is awful age because when they are sick they can't tell you where it hurts or if it hurts (Josh doesn't get fussy when he is sick) you just get to guess what is going on by outside signs their body gives off and then you just feel terrible for them and you try your best to make them feel better. I think hugs are not just to make them feel better but it helps mom too. On my last note I hate colds and ear infections and omnicef (I think I spelled it right)